I love you more because you're the owner.

My sister-in-law stopped by on Wednesday night, with her 5 kids. They’re on their way back to Oregon from a summer in Jacksonville, Florida, and chose to pass through Raleigh. I’m so glad they did - my kids (ages 5 and 4) have only met any of their cousins once, and have never met this particular set. In fact, I hadn’t met the youngest two of Heather’s kids, either. Such is life when you’re many hours’ drive away and you’ve got small kids, right?

It was great fun to see them - so much fun that they decided to spend a second day. We ended up at Monkey Joe’s for a couple of hours, and then hit up the Crazy Fire mongolian barbeque. I walked in and said words I never thought I would say - “Two adults and seven children for dinner, please” and I think I managed to say it smoothly enough. Turns out it was a very pleasant and surprisingly calm meal, and I was very proud of that. :)

Rowen and Elliott LOVED playing with their cousins. E- is 8, and Rowen latched onto her and barely let go for the entire two day visit. Elliott found a partner in crime in 4-year-old T-, and the two sat playing on the kids’ computer for FAR longer than either of their individual attenion spans would have indicated. We spent some time talking on the couch, watching the kids play, and loving just being related. :)

As they were leaving last night to go back to their hotel (they left town this morning), Rowen gave each and every cousin a huge hug and a kiss, and then ran back to Heather for seconds. As she was hugging, she told each cousin, “I love you! I just LOVE you!” and then to Heather, arms around her neck, she said, “I love you more because you’re the owner.”

Heather laughed and said, “The owner of these kids, you mean?”

“Yeah, you take such good care of these SWEET cousins!”

We both cracked up. We will miss them. It’s one of the VERY few things I miss about being on the East coast with almost all our family in the west (I have a brother in Cincinnati, but everyone else is west of the rockies). The casual time. The growing-up-together time. Did you grow up near cousins? What was your experience like?

And on a completely unrelated note: If you have a little girl, how do you contain her clothes? We have yet to figure out a hanging-up vs. folding system that actually works and keeps Rowen’s clothes from a pile on top of her dresser. Do you hang all? Fold all? Have a dresser+closet? Any help would be appreciated. :)

Comments

[Tammy]

How absolutely sweet of your Rowen. We live far away from most of our family as well, only opposite of you ... WE are on the West coast and they are mostly on the East! I'm so thankful for today's technology that keeps all a little closer. When I was growing up overseas, it took TWO WEEKS to communicate with grandparents and cousins ... now it's TWO SECONDS! Such a wonderful thing if used well.
As far as organizing clothes ... I have two girls. Although they are now 19 and 14, I still remember the clothes! We used to hang dresses, skirts, blouses (not t-shirts) ... we folded t-shirts, shorts, pants, jeans, sweaters (don't want hangar marks on those!) ... they had dressers and we even sometimes put those inside the closet and hung the little clothes above. In fact, my 19-year old still does this ... her longer dresses and coats hang on each side, but her skirts and blouses hang above her dresser to one side which is IN the closet. On the other side, she has a mirror and some hooks for jewelry. We also often use bins on the shelves above to house scarves and mittens, or other out-of season clothing ... or even more T-shirts or purses! Having girls is a creative process ... no?!

[Kari Holt]

I can SOOO relate to this post, Jess!!! All of the cousins live away from us so we only see them once a year if we are lucky - My brother has 4 boys, 2 of which I've only met once. Yet when we have the chance to spend time with cousins they absolutely CAN'T get enough of each other!!!! No fighting, no arguing, just sheer BLISS! All of my kiddos spent 10 days in Utah this summer without us (me & Steve ... just grandparents) and had the time of their life bonding with both sets of grandparents and all but one set of cousins. We even had our parents offer to host again next summer to make an annual tradition of it!! My kids can't wait and it sounds like the perfect excuse for Steve and I to plan an "adults only" vacation, don't you think? I do, at times, wish we live closer so we could be more a part of each others lives, but love how family ties bind no matter how often we get to spend time together. That, and because we do live further away it is a "treat" to spend time with cousins and grandparents rather than routine ... a HUGE benefit of living apart, in my opinion :)

Now for girls clothes ... that is a beast, isn't it? Imagine having 3 and having to rotate them down to the next and keep track of who is wearing what size!! But I digress .... We hang skirts, dresses, shirts, and vests (we own few if any sweaters living in the desert). In a dresser we have one drawer dedicated to socks, panties, and PJs, a drawer for shorts/skorts, and a drawer for pants/capris. All shirts are hung on a low bar so they can hang their own. They put dresses and skirts on hangers and I put them on the higher bar. They know which drawer everything else goes in based on the type of clothing. When I fold laundry I sort into a stack of things to be hung, folded items that go in the drawers, and a separate stack of socks, panties, and PJs. I do one load a day and then they have a stack to put away each day. My 5 year old has been putting away her own things for about a year and with practice has become a champ!! Good luck with it - laundry and clothes are my nemesis!! Oh, I also rotate seasonal clothes in and out twice a year (since we don't experience dramatic seasonal changes the way most do ... pants aren't even worn until almost November and then we are back in shorts almost full time by April at the latest).

[Donna]

I echo Kari and Tammy in regards to clothes organization. But I will tell you this.....my girls are 3 years 3 months apart. When the time came that I could not tell their panties apart and I started getting complaints, (I don't remember what age that was but it was pre-teen) they had to start doing their own wash. Seriously! Both my girls have been doing their own laundry that long. Of course the younger one started earlier than the older, but I taught them both how one weekend. They had to bring them to the laundry room and start the washer then I would move the clothes from the washer to the dryer and if they didn't get them out of the dryer they went into a basket, wrinkles and all. If they asked, I would help fold and hang but they had to ask. All of that because I got they panties mixed up! Now at 20 and 23, it's pretty funny to them. They say, "We shouldn't have minded getting our panties in a wad!"

[Julie]

I hang nearly everything (probably because I hate folding). I fold jeans/pants and shorts (some skirts too), and pajamas (underwear and socks/tights are thrown in a basket)

[maclark]

Hang and fold - frocks get hung, alongside jackets and cardis. Everything else gets folded in a 3 drawer chest. Top drawer sectioned into knickers, pjs, vests and socks/tights. 2nd drawer is tops, sorted in pile by colour, shortsleeves on left, longsleeves on right. 3rd drawer is trousers/shorts on left, skirts on right. It works for us - kinda !!!

[Ruth]

Through pre-school, just about everything was hung in coordinating outfits. My attempt to train her as to what went with what (i.e., matched) - not so successful on my part given the outfits she puts together.

With Kindergarten, I started folding pants and shorts and they go in a drawer. T-Shirts, short-sleeved, and long-sleeved shirts are in another drawer. Socks, PJs, tights, swimsuits and panties are in another drawer. In the closet, on the low bar are casual dresses, skorts, skirts, belts, and fleece tops. On the high bar are the dressier dresses and special outfits - stuff I don't want her to just wear for everyday. On the long hanging bar are clothes I pick up on clearance for the next few sizes. All the too small stuff is pulled and shipped to my SIL for her girls.

[Nicky Hurt]

So sweet. I know what you mean about living far away. We're military and my kids were both born in England. Can't drive home from there!

I don't have a girl, nor do I have near as many clothes, probably, but I have a dresser IN the closet. I make my 5yo put his own clothes away, so they go in his dresser (everything that fits him now). I hang up the clothes that are too big or hand-me-downs, because he can't reach the bar (except to pull down stuff that looks interesting, of course). HTH.

[EBPitcher]

Hmmm - my most favorite times in my childhood was hanging with the cousins on my Dad's side. We all lived in the same area for a time and got to see each other often, sometimes even weekly. Holidays always included extended family with kids running wild everywhere. Last year in March we were all together again, with our own kids this time. It was so neat to see how we've all grown and established our own extended families. We are all spread out now and keep in touch, but being together again was VERY, VERY good! Hopefully, we won't be waiting for another funeral to do it again.
-EBP-

[Alis in Wnderlnd]

I love reading your blog. So sweet and fun!

My daughter is 4 1/2 and she owns way more clothes than I do. It's crazy. We hang virtually everything so we can see it. Out of sight, out of mind. We have a dresser, but it is mostly for doll clothes and smaller toys. There is one drawer for her pjs. Inside her closet we have thress small drawers (ELFA system) and there is wehre her socks and underpants go, and then her summer swim stuff. It's kinda wasted space. We sort the closet by type. Shorts/short skirts, long pants and long skirts and dresses, and long-sleeve and short sleeve shirts. As she grows out of things, they get moved up to the top shelf in the closet and eventually out to other friends (when she isn't looking because she then wants to wear it one more time, no matter how small it is.) Ella can reach everything haning in her closet because it has two tiers of bars. She also has a stool that she can ue if needed. She cannot reach the top shelf, which is fine by me.

[Kimberly]

I actually put my daughter's chest of drawers in her closet. I hang all school clothes and dresses. We have a drawer of after school clothes (folded) and a drawer for undies/socks and jammies.

This has been working great so far. It is funny, at an early age they can be very discriminating in their clothes wear. Loves it at the store and then they do not like it. Those things, I save for school and the deal is she can wear whatever is in her drawers when she comes home. Even if it is mis and match...she is creating her own style and we are not out and about for MOMMA to worry.

Good luck with this...

[tracy]

cincinnati?! that is where I live so........if you ever come this way........i'd be thrilled to meet you!

as for girl clothes, even if I had a system to contain it, my girls love nothing more than to rifle around until it all explodes out of their drawers haphazardly anyway. i am a folder, not much of a hanger so maybe that is a better solution?

[nic]

funny - I do exactly the same as the first poster - dresser in closet and all. I have two girls 4 and 5 so we have two dressers (they share a room) though the two dressers of clothes probably has more to do with over-spending grandparents and hand me downs from friends - crazy amounts of clothes. We also have the top two feet or so sectioned off (like a big shelf) for out of season stuff and storage, and their 'rod' is actually a curtain rod that we mounted on the 'ceiling' of the shelf, and as of this year they can reach their hung up clothes (not sure if that is a good thing or a bad thing!).

[Joy]

This was great - I love what kids have to say.

[Ami Pilon]

When my daughter and son were in school, they had closet organizers. They were a cloth divider which hung over the closet bar and each section had a day of the week on it. We put that days folded outfit in each shelf-section in the organizer. The rest of their clothing was in a dresser and/or hung in the remainder of the closet. It worked so well that they each used theirs through their school years.

[Jo-Anne]

Loved reading this post and could relate so well. Raising my 4 children with no family around left a mark on each of them. They have always enjoyed get togethers with their cousins and growing up always spent a week a year with their grandparents, without us! I remember miss Rebecca saying a few short years ago that she will never live far from me - why? I asked - she responded that she doesn't want her kids to be far away from their grandparents like she has. Now they are all late teens and one turned 20 they are supremely aware of the importance of family. We are a very close family, I think, because we have only had each other. They now tell us what is happening in the wider family as all the cousins are linked by facebook/myspace etc. So....while the distance certainly had its downside, I realise now that it is the distance that actually keeps them close. Make sense?

As for girls clothes - with 2 girls I was always so anal about having everything 'just right'. They were both brought up with gorgeously decorated rooms and everything neat and tidy. I do remember that most things were folded - I had shelves in their built-in wardrobe purpose built so everything had its own place. Only dresses were ever hung. Miss Rebecca, now 18, doesn't have to worry about hanging/folding. The floor is the place where everything ends up. Not sure how she tells what is clean or dirty and rarely is their any 'clean' floor space visible. It is trek through the piles to get anywhere. The only thing I can do is make sure the door is firmly shut! Fortunately her younger sister (17) is much tidier and I think has probably inherited my anal gene for tidiness. Either way I love them both so much and have learned not to put too much emphasis on the mundane everyday 'stuff'.

[JeanneD]

We hung a second, lower pole in the closet. Reachable for a child. She learned to hang up her own dresses, tops and long pants. Undies in one drawer, pj's in another, shorts in a third, T's in a fourth and so on. Made life much easier. However, now that she has her own apartment at college, I must say any form of organization seems to have hit the skids. What a mess!!!! LOL.

[Bree]

We're lucky that most of our immediate family is 5 mins away, although there are a few on the Qest Coast.

For girl clothes:
IKEA KOMPLEMENT drawer organizers in a Target 2 shelf bokcase for everyday wear
The bookcase is in her closet (small room).
Dresses, coats and sweaters hang, along with the next size up

HTH

[ShawninAZ]

My daughter just turned 10 and we do a combo. All shirts, skirts and dresses get hung up in the closet. I have all t-shirts together and then the rest are organized by color. She then has one dresser drawer for misc, socks, tights and underwear. 2nd drawer for shorts and skorts. 3rd drawer for jeans and cropped pants. 4th drawer for old t-shirts she never wears and swim suits, goggles etc. Then one other top drawer in her other dresser for slippers and pajamas. We also use a hangup shoe organizer in her closet. Hope that helps!

[Trude]

That's too funny! I can totally relate to not having family nearby - we moved from Norway to southern California when I was about 5, leaving my dad's entire family behind. My grandparents were in Kansas, and the rest of my mom's side were all in New England except for my uncle with his two kids in San Diego. Needless to say, we're super close with them, and not so much with the rest of the fam. We definitely get together as often as possible, but it's tough. That's one of the reasons I've stayed in the area - even though I'd love the chance to move to Portland or somewhere further north, I'd hate to start a family with no one around. I want my kids to have the kind of relationship with their grandparents that I never had the chance to have with mine. Its just something that's become more of a priority to me the older I get. :)

[Cindy]

We hang all of her "good" clothes. Play clothes are folded in a drawer. Just makes it easier when we tell her to get dressed in "good" or "play" clothes.
Plus the "good" clothes are hanging and easily seen, Makes getting ready for school so much easier and also easier to track what fits, what doesn't, etc.

Rowen's comments are so sweet - - love the preception from kids.

[Koren]

we've gone both ways on the clothes and are now much happier that everything is hung up at a level they can reach on their own. socks, undies, swimsuits and some shorts are in baskets on the shelvesof the closet. all other clothes are hangign. the drawers were always out of sight, out of mind and therefore a mess. oh yeah... the nightstand drawers have the jammies.

[Kaylea]

My cousin has a girl just staring K-garten, and she got five small tubs that could fit on the bookshelf in E's room...each is for a different school day.

This way, on sunday, they can sort clothes for all five days. If there's something that has to go to school on a specific day, B can put it in the tub as well....

...you could easily expand it to be for seven days...

....this is designed so daddy can help get her ready/to school on the mornings that mom has to leave early....

[glee]

Jess
loved this post. Re: clothes storage. My 2 boys (18 & 11) share a room. The oldest just left for college. Suddenly "my room is so much bigger mom!" Yea, cuz the big one NEVER put anything away. I called it the clothes bomb. Couldn't even see the floor. and the younger one was happy to slide into that slippery slope. Now he is so thrilled i think he will put his clothes on the shelves where they belong. Their room came w/ built in shelving. I tried baskets, they didn't use them. Or the chest of drawers i provided. The floor was their closet.
That tiny dorm room will fix that. Though i will say, all his favorite shirts hung in the closet. He took them all with their hangers.

my kids cousins live across the ocean....sigh.

[Heather]

Rowen is as articulate as her mom, I gather from this post. :)

Just stopping by to share a link that made me think of your Ele:

http://www.landofnod.com/family.aspx?c=7&f=3992&fromLocation=WhatsNew&l=263

3-D-ish Solar Sytem Sheets - eek! Too cute. My daughter Amanda also loves her Time Life books on Astronomy, so in my adult life I'm becoming well-versed in the constellations due to a certain 6-year-old. She and Ele would really have fascinating discussions!